Existentialism 101

If I can offer an idea here; Yes, in comparison to the infinite variety, depth and scale of the universe, you are almost inconceivably small, meaningless, inconsequential and unimportant.

Of even less consequence is your opinion about your role in the universe, except for the somewhat comforting thought that everyone agrees with you.

Stand-up

There’s a possibility that I may have to start working up a stand-up routine, and as incredible as it may seem, someone is prepared to help me along the way.

I guess it’s going to have to be mainly mini-narratives and ‘heightened’ auto-biography, because my jokes either aren’t that funny or are designed at pleasing the minority of the audience… ie: myself.

And my Sick Sense parody doesn’t fly at all… although I’d love to see that little kid, hand in hand with Michael Jackson, whispering, “I fuck dead people.”

At the other end of the spectrum, I have been accused of being too cerebral…

“Are there any existentialists in the audience tonight? Really? Are you sure, and if so, how? You can turn in your papers at the door, folks.”

Or depressing/angry…

“Look, I don’t want to offend any members of the audience, so forgive me if I just take a quick demographic survey… any black people here? Yes, yes… good… Jews? Alrighty… Suicide victims? No? Ok…. how about failed suicide victims? Yes? QUITTERS!”

I’ll be here all week, but you don’t have to be….

… and they say that mercy’s dead….